Back in Busthineth...

Wednesday, February 27, 2008

Oh, yes.

First, there are some things about me that you must know:

My name is Joe Lindsay a.k.a The Golden Bear (...thegoldenbear!), and I am just trying my best.

There are also some things you must know about The Golden Bear:

The Golden Bear loooves to party.

The Golden Bear knows how to shake his groove thing.

The Golden Bear is not afraid of a guy who cries too much, or of a guy who snorts coke too much. The Golden Bear cries, but only when he means it. The Golden Bear likes coke, but he would rather drink it.

The Golden Bear is a little afraid of the Industry. The Golden Bear knows that the Industry has the power. Win or lose, he decides. The Golden Bear has seen the Industry break bodies, break souls. The Golden Bear is afraid because The Golden Bear loves himself. The Golden Bear does not want to become just another name on the overflowing list of names that the Industry has swallowed up and spit back out.

The Golden Bear is going to be ok. I am trying my best, remember? The Golden Bear is ok because The Golden Bear loves the industry. But the Golden Bear Loves his fans, his bear brigade, more. And The Golden Bear would never do anything to let all the little bears down. So The Golden Bear is going to take a deep breath, and the Golden Bear is going to be brave.


Everything The Golden Bear has said is The Golden truth.


P.S. Daaaaaarrrrrrrrryyyyyyyyylllllllllll!

Friday, February 22, 2008

Letter of Resignation

To all those who I love more than they can ever know,

It has come to this.

There is a time in every man’s life where he must discover what makes him. When he must journey into the center of himself to find out what makes him a man.

I stand on the edge of that journey. My feet scattering rocks over the edge, I look down into the dark depth of my own soul. I must walk that empty blackness, and from the pit of my own heart I must mine my great treasure. I must pull forth a stunning, epic, and shining piece of myself. A testament to all that I am, and all that I hope to someday be.

I will be traveling across land. Driving the endless highways that span this country, hoping that somewhere in this mess of malls and museums, of billboards and bandlands, of praries and parking lots, I may find myself.

It is a journey that I am scared to make. A journey that takes me so far from everything I know, from everything I hold dear. It is a journey west, chasing the sun into the ever-expanding heart of America.

It is a journey that will keep me from you.

I am Joseph Woodley Lindsay, and I am writing to announce my resignation, writing to announce my departure. I am leaving. I am turning my back on everything I know. I am betting the house on this one last great effort to make myself into the man that I know I can be.

It is a decision that was not easy to make. I cried in my bed last night. I haven’t cried since I was a senior in high school and my Dad came home from work and I was sitting on the front porch and he sat down next to me and put his hand on my back and I leaned over and let my guts flow out through my eyes.

I cried because I know that his is the right decision. This is the path that I have to take. I want you to know I love you. I will be with you. I am a part of everything that is you.

Listen closely to the wind, it holds my prayers and my encouragements, shouted southeastward some from some distant, lonesome, Nebraska plain.

Friends, Countrymen, I journey to find The Golden Bear.

With Love and Regret,

Joseph Woodley Lindsay

Tuesday, February 19, 2008


Joseph Woodley Lindsay
"The Golden Bear"
Elmhurst, Illinois
English, Irish, African
Yes, please.
5ft, 9 in
175 lbs.
Finishing and Signature Manuevers:
The Hibernator (Modified Frog Splash)
Bear Brigade Blast (Springboard Cutter)
Notable Feuds:
The Industry
Two Tears Boye
Notable Friendships:
Joe "An Italian Postman Dressed Like Bill Cosby if Bill Cosby Wore a Large White Welding Mask. He Is Killing A Hamster in His Right Hand While He Swings a Hammer Around in His Left. He is Listening to Stevie Wonder" Tocci
Interesting Fact:
The Golden Bear is not just a highly decorated athelete. He is a highly decorated citizen as well. The Golden Bear currently holds three civillian titles. He is the Captain of Candor, the Sultan of Sincerity, and, the General of Genuiness.
Cellular Telephone: (630) 989-1827
Childhood Home Telephone: (630) 832-4614
Mailing Address:
P.O. Box 993
Hampshire College
Amherst, MA 01002
Official Blog:

Monday, February 18, 2008

For The Fans

Just to let you all know, I, The Golden Bear, will be doing a free autograph session this evening. Starting at nine, I will be signing autographs for two hours in room 59E, Enfield House, Hampshire College, Amherst, Massachusetts, 01002.

All greetings will be personalized. There is limited merchandise available, so it is suggested you bring your own.

Hope to see you all there.


Saturday, February 16, 2008

P. the fuck S.

Title Shot!

An Open Letter to the Internet

Dear Internet,
My name is the Golden Bear. I am the most adorable wrestler in the world. Just thought I'd let you know.

(...the golden bear!)

Sunday, February 10, 2008

Bear Beginings

When I was just a little cub, I used to watch WWF Superstars on television with my dad and my little brother on Sundays. My mom would go to church leaving the three of us free to crowd around our old mitsubishi telelvision and watch homilies as delivered by the one and only Hulk Hogan.

Let me tell you somethin' brother, there were few better than the Hulkster. I grew up tall, and I grew up straight. I ate wheaties. I said my prayers. I ate my vitamins. I loved my country. I stood up for what I believed in.

I grew up and became The Golden Bear. I grew up to be come the Captain of Candor, the Sultan of Sincerity, the General of Genuineness.

And when I step into that ring, the people can see the 20 years of wrestling education flowing from my body. They can sense, they can feel that I am one of them. That I, like the Hulkster before me , can be the vehicle, the vessle that will take this sport of sports to the next level.

Bear Brigade, we can do this. Together, as one entity, as one unstoppable force we can march to the gates of this Industry and reclaim it by force.

One after another, our opponents will fall until we, together, are standing in the center of the ring, our title, the world heavyweight title raised, above our heads. And we can yell, with one voice, "The Golden Bear!" and then we can whisper, with one voice, "...the golden bear!" And that whisper will echo through the annals of wrestling history for the rest of recorded time.

"..the golden bear! ...the golden bear! ...the golden bear!"

Wednesday, February 6, 2008

Welcome to The Official Golden Bear Blog!

Hello. Welcome to The Golden Bear's Official Blog. The Golden Bear is thankful for your support. The Golden Bear urges you to sign up for the Official Golden Bear Fan Club, the Bear Brigade.

All Bear Brigade Members recieive:

1. 8x10 glossy signed by The Golden Bear, himself.
2. Personalized e-mails from The Golden Bear, himself.
3. Special deals on tickets for events featuring The Golden Bear, himself.
4. One Official Bear Brigade Badge worn by The Golden Bear, himself.

All of this for the low low price of a 20 dollar, yearly membership. It is a once in a lifetime chance to connect with the man that lives behind the Golden Bear.

If you call now and enter the secret password I'll let you in for half price. This is an incredible deal, one you and your loved ones really can't afford to miss. You can order by phone at 413-559-2318,

-just tell 'em The Bear sent you!

-The Bear.
-The Golden One.

P.S. Title shot?