Holy Fucking Shit.

Ladies, the Golden Bear is just trying his best. Gentlemen, go fuck yourselves.

I am a bear with golden ears and golden paws. I am a bear that is golden and friendly and polite around others. I am a bear who smiles and gives high fives. I am a bear who sometimes breaks tables.

The kids love a high-fiving table breaking bear. The watch me on their TV's and they see all my golden fur and they want to be me. Their mothers let them watch because I am an adorable bear that preaches about family values, honesty, and solving conflicts peacefully. I am a welcome change from the rest of the mystic world of simulated violence and money that lies at the heart of the wrestling industry.

And I am a way better role model than Darryl "I hit nine home runs today so I am going to snort nine lines off the bare asses of nine different prostitutes in celebration" Strawberry.

In conclusion. I believe that I deserve a title shot. I am going to get one. Even if that means chasing the Industry across this country, I am getting my title shot. I am winning my belt. It's gold and I am golden.

Adorably,
-Cpt. Candor
-Sul. Sincerity
-Gen. Genuineness

(...tHegolDenbEAr?)